Letters to Cupcake
by Anonymous Crazy Girl
Summary: Vi writes letters to Caitlyn but she doesn't intend to send them because she simply needs to express her feelings regarding the sheriff.
1. Letter 1

_Dear Caitlyn,_

_I sincerely have absolutely no idea why I'm writing this shit. I will never ever send you this letter or even dare hand it to you personally. I think that the alcohol finally got to me. But even that can't erase you off my mind. I've got zero clue why. You're just there, appearing in the most unlike situations. Like when I went on patrol alone this morning or when I was at this pub the other day, drinking my misery away. Surprisingly enough, thinking of you brought greater comfort than the one I expected and than the one any sort of drink could possibly offer. And you know, I shouldn't be feeling this way about you because you're my boss, for crying out loud! This is so, so inappropriate. Maybe it's my way of coping with my past, who knows. But for someone who tries to forget, I sure as hell recall our first meeting extremely well, details and everything._

_You had set me up. Of course you did. I'll be foolish enough to believe you hadn't been orchestrating the whole thing for months. You kept an eye on me for Gods know how long. You came in alone. No backup whatsoever. I thought of you as foolish. I could destroy all of your bones with one punch but you still came alone. You caught me like a predator catches its prey. And instead of trying to run away, I stood there and listened to you because, fuck me, but what else was I supposed to do when a damn cop, a sheriff that is, went into all this trouble for my sorry ass? And you spoke to me and I realized your speech wasn't predetermined. I'm still not sure if you had prepared one before and decided not to go for it or hadn't even bothered in the first place, but if want to be honest, I'm pretty convinced the first scenario happened. But you spoke to me with sincerity and for some odd fucking reason, you admired me. You admired me for doing what I thought was the right thing. As if I needed to be praised for something so simple. It seemed simple to me back in the day. But now I understand better. I understand why you were so surprised by me._

_But I still fail to understand why I'm so infatuated with you and why I'm writing to you something you'll never going to read. Ever._

_Yours, Vi_


	2. Letter 2

_Dear Caitlyn,_

_Sometimes I think you have no idea about the impact you have on me and sometimes I think you do and you're just a heartless bitch._

_The other day when Jayce was around, stars, I was so fucking angry and frustrated and everything along those lines. He flirted you none-stop and you did nothing but be kind to him. I came _this_ close to snap at him. Though, that pretty much was obvious, to you at least. He's just so gross and argh. I mean, don't get me wrong, he's a great inventor and scientist but he's also a douchebag. He might be the 'Defender of Tomorrow' but that never stopped him from being an asshole, did it? I just don't like the way he's treating you like a piece of meat. I hate it. I hate that he can make you smile with all those stupid things and I hate that if you two turned out okay as a couple, no one would have a problem with it. In fact, they'd be thrilled. I hate it that I can only stand in the background and do nothing but tolerate it because you're my fucking boss.__I sound like 17-year-old teen who's jealous over her crush-_

_Jealous? Did I just write down the word jealous? Am I… jealous? And do I have a crush on you? In my last letter I wrote than I'm infatuated with you but I never thought I'd that far to call it a "crush"._

_Fuck, how old am I anyways? I simply care about you and I want you to be happy with someone who deserves you._

_Yours, Vi_


	3. Letter 3

_Dear Caitlyn,_

_I'm so, so sorry. Jinx is all my fault. I should have talked to you about this. But I chickened out. I was afraid that you would probably think less of me what difference would it make if I told you back then or now? Right. We'd know how to deal with this fucking blue-haired nuisance.__I don't like keeping secrets from you, cupcake, I really don't, but you have no idea how difficult it is for me to talk about my past, a past I'm struggling to forget. I'm trapped in my mind, Cait. All these things keep repeating themselves in my dreams over and over again. It's horrible and it fucking sucks.__When I was still a child, they picked us up from the streets. Having no one else, we thought we would finally get a home. Oh, how wrong we were. We were brought to a laboratory where they tested on us all different types of chemicals. We were exposed to radioactivity, for fuck's sake. Each day was a torture. But without knowledge, they were infusing us with weapons that would soon turn against them. So if you were wondering how I obtained my quick healing abilities and my strength, that's how I did. Though I did learn how to fight later when I was in my gang. Jinx and I escaped together and joined them. For once, we weren't mistreated and we were doing something that we thought it was worth it.__Jinx and I were practically inseparable. She was the mastermind behind everything. Under all this madness, I believe she's still the same genius I remember. But I believe this madness began while we were still in Zaun, in that fucking lab. Whatever they were infusing her with, surely fucked her brain up too much. I never noticed that there was something wrong with her except the occasional anxiety attacks we both had. But other than that there was no sign._

_I bet she snapped completely when I abandoned the gang and hid in Piltover. I don't really know what happened to her afterwards. But she probably found out where I was and here she is now. I'm not sure what she wants from me, she's a psycho. Perhaps she's trying to send a message across but I'm just too stupid to get it. I don't know anymore, Caitlyn. I wish you can forgive me one day for hiding all this stuff from you, should you ever find out._

_Vi_


	4. Letter 4

_Dear Cupcake,_

_The League is probably the best thing that has ever happened to me - after taking the job as an officer of course - and once again it's all thanks to you. I find great satisfaction in punching shit all the time but you probably know that already. It's also a good way for me to blow some steam off without using 'excessive' force against criminals and also make new acquaintances._

_I like those Noxians champions, they know what's up. Darius is such a good guy, never turning his back on a good challenge and Katarina is too cunning for her own good. Riven is just so fucking badass even if she doesn't identify herself as a Noxian anymore. But honestly fuck Draven, Darius' brother, I swear to the stars, he's ego is great than Jayce's._

_The Demacians are just so fucking gross. They are all so prideful and stuck up their noses, argh! In contrast with the Freljordians who are so much cooler than those guys. Sejuani and Tryndamere are so much fun to hang out with but please, for the love of the stars, don't tell each other because they're going to have my head._

_I don't know how I feel about Ionians, they confuse the shit out of me, y'know? I could only claim that I somewhat like Akali and Irelia but that's just it. Also Targonians. Another queer folk. They're too much for me, you know what I mean? Although I'd like to get to know Diana better._

_Guess I have a thing for exiles, huh?_

_The best part out of this is that I get to beat the shit out of Jinx whenever we are teamed up against each other. Goss, it's just feels so good finally getting my hands on her. It's like getting revenge for all those times she was being a pain in my ass__.__But the worst part of it all is when I'm obliged to fight against you, Cait. I feel fucking terrible whenever I kill you, and even though I know it's not real, it hurts like hell. Seeing you dead is one of my worst nightmares coming true. You mean so much to me and watching you lying lifeless is just so fucking heartbreaking. If I ever considered leaving, that's the reason why. I know it's not my fault but I feel the need to tell you I'm sorry. I'm sorry for every single time I had to kill you in the Rift, Cait._

_Always yours, Vi_


	5. Letter 5

_Dear Cupcake,_

_Stars. I hate you so fucking much sometimes. I hate that you get to boss me around all the time, especially when it comes to stuff that's out of our job. You literally made me dress up for that stupid Christmas ball. Are you fucking kidding me?_

_The last place I'd want to be during Christmas Eve is a huge-ass mansion that belongs to one of those upper-class pigs surrounded by fake people that hate me till there's no tomorrow. You know I don't fit there, cupcake. Why are you doing this to me? I'd rather spend my night not being sober in the local pub with people that actually enjoy my company rather than being constantly on the alert not to accidentally offend someone and being intimidated by your beauty and your fucking sexy upper city accent that kills me every single time.__In conclusion, sometimes I really, really hate you. I just hope there will be alcohol because I won't survive this otherwise._

_Always yours, Vi_


	6. Letter 6

_Dear Caitlyn,_

_I'm still trying to wrap my finger around what happened last night._

_You looked so, oh so ravishing last night in that dress. I'm not scared to admit that I just couldn't look at anything else when you were around me. And you smelled so good. I suddenly stopped caring that you had dragged me into this. I was actually content that you did.__The night was okay, no less boring than I had expected it to be, but after a couple of glasses of good wine, things escalated rather quickly if you ask me. You weren't really being yourself. Heck, you even flirted with me! I've been flirting with you for a good time now and you almost dismissed me with that very characteristic roll of your eyes. Tonight it was different because you actually flirted back! I thought I was actually dreaming. Then we danced together, you complimented my choice of clothing and when we went outside from some fresh air, we kissed under that forgotten mistletoe that you so subtly brought to my attention._

_Then we grabbed a cab and I brought you home in a drunken state and you were acting really stupid and you kissed me again and I thought I'd completely lose myself and do something we would probably regret later. And not because I didn't want it, trust me when I say that I did, but not like that. I couldn't. Not when you were so drunk yourself and you clearly didn't know what you were doing._

_Besides, no matter how I feel about you, you're still my boss Caitlyn. We can't be doing just that will jeopardize your career that you worked so hard for. I would never do that and you know that. I can't do this and it's not because I don't care about you. It's exactly because I care._

_Always yours, Vi_


	7. Letter 7

_Dear Caitlyn,_

_I'm writing this as I lay down on a hospital bed and you're out there cleaning up my mess._

_Jinx again, of course. It's always Jinx. But this time, she crossed a line. She tried to get to me through you, by harming you. I would never, ever let that happen as long as I breathe. Because I love you. And because lately I've been really fucking stupid._

_I've been avoiding you after the Christmas Eve incident. I know I hurt you and I'm deeply sorry for that but that was never my intention and you know it. I was simply trying to sort my feelings out and also give you some space to figure out what you really wanted. I wasn't sure if this was just one of the games your drunk self was trying to play or if you've felt the same as I did. Because I've known you for the past five years Cait but I could never possibly read you. On the other hand, I'm a very easy book to read, ain't I?_

_However, as mentioned, I thought you were simply drunk and it was probably if I never confronted you about it, which was stupid, but I never had a stable relationship with anyone so I wouldn't know how to deal with a situation like this. And I didn't want you to have your job risk, especially for me. I couldn't do that to you, ever. So, I let you hurt while I played dumb, which was pretty fucking stupid from my part._

_But when Jinx broke into a rampage again and tried to harm you, I told myself; 'Screw this. For Cupcake'. And y'know, I still thought it was worth it because I knew that I loved you. I fell for you a long time ago, slowly and steadily, and I fell really hard. Both literally and figuratively._

_I hear someone coming. It could be you. I'm finishing those lines before I hide the letter away. I still don't want you to know, not yet. It's not the right time._

_Yours truly, Vi_


	8. Letter 8

_Dear Cupcake,_

_Everyone knows. Am I relieved? Probably yeah. I was surprised to see your parents being so supportive despite the fact that I thought them to be a little more conservative than they are but I'm glad. And I'm glad our fellow champions are being also very supportive. The society not so but there were mixed reactions and I can't say I'm surprised that the youth is far more open minded than the rest.__Before we came out, I remember you telling me that 'we'd be the sparkle that would ignite the change in Piltover' and I sincerely hope you will be proven right once again. But right now I really don't care about any of this stuff. I'm planning on finally giving your those godforsaken letters. Hell, we've been together for ten months, you ought to know, especially after everything we've been through._

_I love you so much and I hope you know._

_Always yours, Vi_


End file.
